Trinitas Blog

Parent Orientation marks the beginning of the school year and is one of the few opportunities I will have to address all Trinitas parents together in a face-to-face setting. In the weeks leading up to this night, I cast about for an idea, a theme for this address that will encourage, challenge, and perhaps, inspire each of you as we head into the new school year together.

There is a passage from Ray Bradbury’s Dandelion Wine that I reflect upon at the end of every Summer. It comes as the main characters, two brothers of Logic school age, are realizing that this season of their life is coming to an end:

And they left the mellow light of the dandelion wine and went upstairs to carry out the last few rituals of summer, for they felt that now the final day, the final night had come. As the day grew late they realized that for two or three nights now, porches had emptied early of their inhabitants . . . and surely when they abandoned the conflict the war with Time was really done, there was nothing for it but that humans also forsake the battleground. (p. 281)

Summer has always felt like that to me, like “a war with Time,” where every moment is grasped tighter. This is why I always tell students that Summers are Sacred. It is a kind of Sabbath, a season when we labor through rest.

Shh. Don’t tell the kiddos, but the summer is winding down. There are certainly a few students out there who can hardly wait for school to start, but the vast majority may not even want to think about school before the alarm goes off on that first morning back. The former will be ready to go, but the latter will spend the first three weeks of school re-acclimating themselves to the speed and rigor of academic life. Fortunately, there are a few things parents can do to prepare students’ hearts and minds to return to school in the fall.

One of my favorite summer songs, “Summertime,” was composed by Gershwin in 1934 for the opera Porgy and Bess but it wasn’t until the first lady of song, Ella Fitzgerald, recorded the lullaby in Berlin in 1968 that the song came to be identified with the relaxingly smooth vibe that marks the three months between May and September.

Kindergarten has a way of sneaking up on young parents. After all, it seems like just yesterday that you brought your sweet bundle of joy home from the hospital and now she is starting school in the fall. How are parents to know if their child is ready for this huge step? Here are six simple steps to help you answer that question for yourself. But remember, if your child isn’t ready, relax, August is still several months away. There is enough time this summer to get ready, if you have a plan and a willingness to work it.  

Last time out, we ended our discussion with a list of questions. We established the fact that there is no magic in those questions. They are merely questions that leave space for your child to tell his story in a way that he hasn’t even thought of yet. You can think of other questions like these that will help peel back the layers, and you can change them to fit the moment. The point is to get to the sin that motivated the action. For example, striking someone in anger is a sinful behavior, but oftentimes, there is something else motivating that anger and violence, whether pride or envy or covetousness or something else. If we don’t work to get at that sin that is rooted down in the heart, it is going to continue to manifest itself on the surface somehow—this time it was anger and violence, but next time, it could be something different.  

Picking up the thread from a couple of weeks back, I want to discuss correction a little further. We have talked about what correction is, why we must correct, and why our children don’t always love correction. Now, we’ll examine correction that addresses patterns of sin or even besetting sins in our children's lives.

Sometimes, our children have a bigger problem putting off sin than we had hoped. Perhaps it begins with a single event. We correct and move on. Then the very next week, here we are again in the same situation. Coincidence? Maybe. You correct again and move on. But oh, no! In a matter of days, here we are again. Now, to be fair, there are so many variables here that it’s hard to reduce this to a few brief words. For example, the type of sin dictates how we address it. Is it forgetfulness, gossip, disobedience, disrespect, unkindness, laziness? And there are plenty of other variables, as well, that have a bearing on how we proceed. We can’t get into all those methods here, so we’ll stick to a conversation about principles.  

Over the past couple of posts, I have attempted to define biblical correction and to show that God requires it of us. Not only does he require adults to correct ourselves with His word as the standard, but also, He requires us to correct our children, “to put them right,” according to the standard found only in God’s word. Seems like a slam dunk, right? Well, maybe not exactly.

If your children sometimes bristle at correction, or they listen attentively and then go on doing what they were doing, or they give you a thousand excuses for why their behavior was justified and never want to own up to any wrongdoing, or they are compliant when you are near but behave like the devil when you are away, then read on.